Loss

Today would have been my Dad's 71st birthday. I talked to him this morning even though he is no longer with us. He passed away on January 15, 2000. There is not a day that I don't think of him or miss him or usually talk about him. There will never be a day in my life when I won't miss him. I know he would be so pleased with the changes I have made in my life, would be so very proud of me. I owe a lot of how my life has turned out to Daddy. He was hard on me but he knew that is what I need. I don't need to be babied because when I am challenged that is when I dig deeper and take action.

My best friend just lost her father so that's makes this day even harder. He died on Sunday. He fought a long hard battle against cancer. But he won really; he is in heaven now. He was a very good Christian man. He loved the Lord with all his heart. He fought a good fight and never had a bad attitude about it. He was a quarterback with the Baltimore Colts in his younger years so approached his cancer like it was a football game. His doctor was his "coach" and the turns the cancer took were like quarters in a game to him. His writing about it was very moving.

He leaves behind a wife who will be lost without him, a daughter who has lost her hero, and a son who will not have a soft place to fall when life is hard for him. But as long as they love him and remember him he will never truly be gone. His hand will be on their lives forever as they will always carry him in their hearts. There will be days when they go to pick up the phone to call him only to have to put the phone back down as they remember he is not there to call anymore. They will talk and laugh about all the things he did and said and the messages he ingrained in them will always be there to draw on. It will be hard, very hard. It takes years to come to grips with but slowly the pain will change and ease. There will be good days, bad days and worse days. The first year is the hardest because you have all the firsts without him, first Christmas, first New Years, first anniversary, first football season, etc. It's 7 years now without my Dad and I am better... but I still cry. I cried this morning, I'm crying now. My heart breaks for my friend, for her Mom, for her children who have lost their grandfather, for anyone who knew Dave Loner. He will be missed deeply, truly, and always. Just like my Dad.

Say hello to my Dad, Dave and tell him I said "Happy Birthday." I love you both deeply, truly and always.

Life is sweet! Treasure everyday with your loved ones you never know when it will be their last.